1. Watch 2. Learn 3. Repeat if Necessary

Well hello strangers! Plenty to get to today, I promise.

Friday:

Friday wound up being super awesome, despite having an entirely inauspicious start.  That was, specifically, waking up in the pre-dawn (this seems to be happening a lot) sobbing after having a terribly realistic dream my mother died of some drawn-out illness.  I can't help but appreciate the thoroughness of this particular cruelty - my dear old subconscious withheld the dream until I was conveniently on the other side of the world and can hardly call my family without jumping through hoops of fire.  Thanks subconscious!  Doing me another solid, one day at a time.  Anyway, enough brooding.

When I woke up for the second time I was inexplicably chipper, and headed off to work with a grin perma-pasted on my face.  I think this was partly because it was sort of sunny out (a major achievement for Hamburg) and because I can't believe that my job is actually sitting around drawing and trying to be creative all day... for the most part.  I spent the morning in exactly this manner while blasting Girl Talk and The White Panda in my headphones.  Oh yeah, we get to wear headphones at work too.

During lunch I went out with a couple of coworkers who I haven't eaten with yet, and got to bond with one of them over our shared love of the delightfully eccentric Werner Herzog.  I was surprised to learn that Herzog isn't that well-known in Germany, despite his total awesomeness.  If you ever get a chance you need to see some of his films.  Most people have heard of Grizzly Man, but my favourites were My Best Fiend, and his version of Nosferatu.  I've been accused previously of over-selling My Best Fiend, which I suppose you could call "niche-humour", but I find it totally brilliant.

After lunch I mostly sat around getting Photoshop tutorials, then everyone ended the day early with a beer, which felt entirely European and super awesome.  Come to think of it, I think that was the first beer I've had since arriving in Germany.  But that really isn't important.

After work I had just enough time to get changed and make myself presentable before it was time to head out to a coworker's place for dinner before clubbing.  In North America the practice seems to be to have a light dinner or no dinner so that 1) you don't feel bloated while dancing, and 2) you get a buzz more easily.  Here in Europe it is quite the opposite: you have a solid dinner so that you can drink all the more while out.  Just a fun fact.  The place we went to was called Terrace Hill, and it's located in - this is the COOLEST part - an old bomb shelter.  It's this giant concrete affair with towers and a large patio.  To get in you're ferried up in an elevator, complete with an Operator.  I confess one of my favourite parts of the evening was right at the beginning while we were in line.  I was saying something to a member of our group when a gentleman ahead of us in line asked if I was American, to which I of course replied that I'm Canadian.  Well, it turns out he was from Minnesota, but was familiar with British Columbia after having lived for some time in Seattle.  But really I was just delighted to hear someone with a North American accent.  Of all the things I thought I would miss I had never even considered accents, especially since everyone knows foreign accents are hot.  But meeting someone from sort-of-home just made me feel a tiny bit less lonely and far from home.  Now as for the two questions I know you're all burning to know: 1) Was he hot? and 2) Was he single?  Well, 1) yes, he was exceptionally good looking, but 2) he had a boyfriend, because of course every man I find attractive is either in a relationship, gay, or both.  I wish there was a way of letting Mother Nature know she's wasting her time weeding me out of the gene pool - I already chose not to have kids, so can I please get a date now?!

But I digress.  The club night was lots of fun, and it was a novel experience to have people remarking about my accent all the time.  But this brings me to a Europe-rant that's been brewing since my arrival.  Everyone smokes here.  And they smoke everywhere.  All the time.  While it's illegal to do it indoors, many people at the club just lit up inside anyway, which drove me crazy.  Smoke gives me terrible headaches, and it makes your clothes smell like a homeless person (my club outfit is now quarantined in the cleaning closet).  Off the top of my head I can think of..... one person who doesn't smoke.  There are a few I don't about, but the safer bet on this continent is that they probably do.  It certainly isn't stigmatized here the way it is at home.  Grumble.  Let's just hope I don't get lung cancer from second-hand smoke, because if I do I'll be PISSED.

One possible consequence of all this smoking, however, is in general the women here are all skinny and are often also tall.  This was entirely apparent at the sports-themed club night, where most girls were in some form of spandex and a sports bra.  Obviously not everyone looks like a model, but obesity and extra fat are not nearly the problem they are States-side.  Not feeling short and fat may be more of a challenge than usual, ugh.

Anyway, true to their reputations the Germans' party stamina was faaaaaaar superior to mine (we didn't even get to the club until 11:30).  Goodness knows how long they stayed for, but despite liberal consumption of vodka redbulls by quarter to four I felt like I was going to fall over and decided it was time to go.  My friend accompanied me to the metro station and got the ticket for me, then pointed which way I was to go.  If only things had stayed so simple!  Sure enough I got on the train, but after getting on was convinced that I was headed in the wrong direction.  After giving it some thought, I got off at the next station and caught the next train in the opposite direction while feeling frustrated at my bumbling.  However, after four or so stops I - of course - realised that I had been mistaken, and that now I was truly going in the wrong direction.  Damnit!  So, once again, off I got and climbed on to the train going in the right direction.  I finally got to the stop I wanted, got off, and then tried to find my way out of the Underground, planning to walk home.  As it turned out I just wound up at the stop off for the other line that ran through that station.  For once my luck came through and as it happened this train would take me practically to my doorstep.  So on I got, and at last I crawled into bed around 5am.

Saturday:

Despite the exceptionally late night I woke up around 10am.  Since I still hadn't gotten an alarm clock I decided that I would use Saturday to figure out how the metro worked and to go find an alarm clock.  After studying their website for a short while I deduced which line to use (only one train this time!) and how much to pay the ticket machine.  The ticket machines, thank god, had a nice and obvious British flag at the bottom so you could view the menu in English, after which things became pretty simple.  If you're ever coming to Germany, there are three important things to know before you take the metro.  The first is (obviously) which line you need to get on to.  The second is how many zones you'll be moving through, and the third is the name of the direction you're travelling: it is really easy to lose your sense of direction underground.  If you know these three things though, you're set.  So my travels on Saturday wound up being about a million times easier than Friday night and much easier than my travels last Saturday too.  Just like last Saturday I started the trip off with some Starbucks.  Even though it's not amazing coffee it reminds me so much of home I can't resist it.  Also, the interior of the one I was at yesterday was absolutely stunning.  It's right next to the Hamburg lake, and it had a balcony level above main floor, much like the dome of a church.  The walls, pillars and ceilings are all painted in a Rococo/Baroque type style, and next time I go I'll take my camera so you can all have a look.  After my dose of caffeine I hunted down some home-accessories type place I FINALLY FOUND AN ALARM CLOCK.  It is bulky and ridiculous but it was both a clock and alarm and therefore I bought it.  Setting the alarm was a fairly simple matter, but I have discovered that turning the alarm off is quite a different matter.  It's one of those old-school clocks with two buttons and zero directions.  I have concluded that I must turn on my alarm in the late evening, and simply turn it off when it fire-alarms me into wakefulness.  Oh yes, that's the other thing.  It sounds like a goddamn fire alarm.  I can just imagine how fun this will be.

Anyway, because alarm clock shopping is about as fun as sweater lint and I had an entire day to kill I decided to have a good wander around Hamburg's shopping district (a dangerous pastime for my credit card).  I had had my heart set on finding some lilac coloured trouser shorts after falling in love with a look I saw on College Fashion a few days ago:

I absolutely love everything about it.  I already have the shirt, the belt, and matching shoes; the only missing piece was the shorts.  Unfortunately, despite bright trousers' popularity this Spring/Summer I couldn't find these anywhere.  Finally I found some trousers that were the right colour (and even on sale) at Urban Outfitters.  However, these had flaws.  They weren't quite Jodhpurs but they were close: slim in the calves, fuller at the hip.  The fabric was also on the flimsy side, to the point of transparency if you weren't wearing the correct undergarments.  All in all, I felt they made my ass look big and my legs look short, which was waaaay too much to overlook.  I don't like adhering to strict fashion "rules", but one I do try to follow is no matter how much you like something on someone else, if it's not equally fabulous on you then DON'T BOTHER.

This isn't to say I went home empty-handed though (bahahahahaha imagine!).  No, instead I hit the cosmetics counter at Chanel, who I have discovered does makeup unlike anyone else (a post on this to follow), and then got some aviator sunglasses - an item I've wanted for a long time but have had difficulty finding an adequately light and flattering pair.

Now I'm going to introduce a debate that has me quite conflicted.  About two years ago I became friends with a girl in a class I was taking.  She happened to have a purse that I admired every time I saw it and I made a point of finding out the designer, who turned out to be a British brand called Mulberry.  They make beautiful, understated, classically-designed handbags in staple colours.  The purse stuck in my head, and I don't exaggerate when I say I had a dream about it once.  However, being a student I had never had the kind of money necessary to invest in one of these bags previously, and I've never even seen them sold in Canadian stores.  And then it all changed.  While I was out last Saturday I was exploring a big high-fashion department store and there, in the corner, was a Mulberry collection, and amongst it was what I've come to think of as my bag.  Now I hardly need to tell you this, but I'm one of those people who can justify just about any purchase, no matter how ridiculous and/or expensive.  Therefore it is nothing short of miraculous that entirely-without-self-control me managed to make it out of the store without this purse.  What stopped me, of course, was the price tag, which works out to be about 1/6 of the budget for my entire stay in Europe.  Were this the end of my trip I would get it without hesitation, but since there are still three months and countless adventures ahead I am hesitating to spend that kind of money.  The thing is, it's not often that any purse holds my attention for two years, which I would consider a good indication of lasting love.  Furthermore, it's a classic design and classic colour from a reliable label, so it stands to reason that this would be an item I'd buy once and own forever.  Everyone knows one good purse is worth five "meh" purses, which is probably why they cost so damn much.  As I mentioned earlier, I don't know whether these purses are sold in Canada, which means now would be a good time to get one and it also means I'm not going to have to look at it on the arm of every woman I see once I get home (I hate the omnipresence of brands like Louis Vuitton).  If I get the purse, it will always be a reminder of this trip; something special I got in Europe.  Finally, it turns out I'm going to have much less time off from work than I had anticipated, and so I won't be doing the kind of moving about I had thought I would.  So, there isn't going to be quite the financial drain I thought there would be.  So would it be so very bad to buy the purse?  I can't decide!!  Votes please???!!  To aid in your decision making, this is the much-discussed purse:

So, having (arguably needlessly) spent money, I headed home and went to bed nice and early. 

Sunday:

Today it poured rain, so I did the sensible thing an lazed about in bed watching movies, cleaning, and getting some laundry done.

Not-Quite-Facebook Find:

While reading College Fashion this evening I came across two particularly awesome links.  The first is to a video that is SO CUTE that it is the first time a video has made me cry out of sheer adorableness:



The second is to a post that addresses the social challenges faced by women who don't want children.  Keep in mind that the large pictures that break up the text don't actually signify the end of the article - just scroll past them.

http://galadarling.com/article/i-dont-want-children-am-i-a-freak-why-wont-everyone-leave-me-alone

This one struck a particular chord with me as I never intend to have children and have been faced with the "I know better" reaction on more than one occasion.  While I'm not sure I could be quite as understanding toward those who mock my choice, I think that she does an excellent job of explaining our position and the some of the reasons why women might choose not to have kids.  However, her focus seemed to be on personal incompatibility, and I thought that there was another significant factor that needed to be mentioned.

I will admit that the primary reason I don't plan on having children is because it entails a life I don't want for myself and am convinced would make me unhappy.  Having had plenty of time to think about it though, there are a few other significant reasons that deter me from procreating and are worth considering no matter who you are:

For starters, it is no secret that we are burning through resources at an unsustainable rate.  We are already facing a crisis over oil that - depending on your political stance - has been causing terribly destructive wars (is there any other kind?) for several decades now.  While this is bad enough, I cringe to think of what the world will be like later down the line when it is fresh water - another dwindling resource - that is being fought over.  My understanding of humanity's behavior is that we are going to continue doing what we have done since the dawn of our existence: fight pointless fights over territory, resources, religion, power, and race.  Why would I ever want someone I loved so much to be a part of that world?  I barely want to be a part of it myself!  You may call it cynical, I call it rational.

To continue, we currently live in an overpopulated world.  This is a particularly difficult issue to confront due to the huge bias against contraception that is a major part of many religions.  Add to that the inaccessibility of contraceptives and sex-education in many parts of the world (whether it's due to impoverishment or due to religious lobbyists in parts of the USA) and it becomes more and more important to use our own awareness wisely.  If I know that families like the Duggars are doing their best to contribute to both overpopulation and to use up as many resources as humanly possible then it is all the more important that I have no children at all.

Finally, I am repelled by the idea of being conned by biology into doing something so against my beliefs.  I won't lie that I'm a little terrified that as I get older all of a sudden something will change and I'll get what I like to call "baby fever".  As far as I'm concerned this is an outdated scam of Mother Nature's to ensure the survival of our species.  It horrifies me that some renegade hormones may take over my brain and leave me with a decision that I would regret for the next twenty years.  Furthermore (and most inflammatory of all), to me there is something fundamentally narcissistic about having children.  The whole notion of "what would our kids look like?" and of continuing bloodlines are ideas that call to mind the quest for immortality in Homer's Iliad.  As truly rational beings I think there is something to be said for overcoming these more primal instincts and making decisions based upon who we are, not what we are.  To be clear, if that means that after all that you still want children, then by all means go for it!  There is certainly much to say for having kids (as I have been told enthusiastically by my parents): they can teach you so much about yourself and about life and there is such joy to be found in one's family.

I admit (almost) unflinchingly that five years down the road I may be singing an entirely different tune.  In that case I will most likely be cursing my pigheadedness at posting such an article on the internet where it will live indefinitely... but I wont ever deny that each of these points is seriously worth considering before making such a life-altering choice.  Personally I'm a huge advocate of adoption: what could be better than taking a child doomed to a life of impoverishment, abuse and/or neglect and offering it a loving home?  While adoption is for many people inaccessible due to its expense, I hope to see the day where it can be more attainable and widely used.  Anyway, I hope this has at least given you something to think about.

Moral of the Story: Epic Fail

Alright kids.  I have an apology to make.  I have been very M.I.A. over the last few weeks, and for the few of you who check regularly it's annoying.  Most recently some renovating has been going down in my humble abode, and so it has taken most of my time and energy, and then last week I was off to my old Alma Mater to get my grad photos done.  It was quite the trip and definitely worth the foot of snow that greeted my arrival.  None of that would be toooo troubling to my blogging though.  The real problem has been my hard drive's recent decision to crash.  Permanently.  So, off my laptop went to get fixed, where it was given a whole new hard drive.  The important part is that I lost all my usernames, passwords, and PHOTOS.  So all the work I've been putting in to collecting photos for the blog are now gone, and it seems like quite the Herculean task to reassemble them with all this other business going down.  Pardon the complaining, but ARRRRGGGGGGGGGG.  Anyway, to try and make up for my epic fail, I'll throw ya'll a fashion tidbit until I can come up with something better.

One trend I've noticed emerging over the last year or so is that of cargo pants - specifically green skinny cargo pants.  You may have seen such celebrities as Leighton Meester, Victoria Beckham, and Vanessa Hudgens among others all rocking this look.

I love the neutral colour and also that they're a fun alternative to jeans and leggings, which I seem to live in.  What stopped me from getting them was a concern over the bulk - the flap pockets on the sides and back made me worry they would create a lumpy silhouette on anyone not supermodel slim.  So for a while that was that, and I forgot about them.  Then recently our (only) local clothing store went under, and so they've been having closing sales for the last week or so.  Today I went to check it out, and what did I find but skinny green cargo pants!  Unable to resist temptation I threw them on, and after some debate (which was quickly settled by 40% discount) I brought them home.  I am now totally pleased.  it seems the key to avoiding bulk is to find a lightweight stretchy fabric - I barely notice the pockets.  Thanks to their celebrity following I already have lots of ideas on how to wear them and they blend nicely into my closet full of muted neutrals.  I wouldn't recommend breaking the bank to buy a pair as cargo pants are generally only good for a year or two before they become dated and work their way out again.  However, if you really want to, the celebrities are all wearing the J Brand interpretation.  I myself went for a pair of Mavis that are very similar (both pictured below).

 Top: J Brand Bottom: Mavi

 If you're looking for a quick way to update your wardrobe, skinny cargoes are great for their versatility and comfort: if you live in jeans it will be a smooth transition.  If you'd like some inspiration for how to wear cargoes, College Fashion has done several posts with suggestions, such as this one: